Wednesday,24th September

I don't know what should i do or react. I try hard to control my emotions today in class and it took me for quite sometime to relax myself. I was trying to control myself and can't be bothered to do other things cause i was really concentrate telling myself to relax... At the same time i did not do whatever i should do for (CE) lessons, its not that i don't want to do but its just that i'm trying to control myself, my emotions. I really can't take it anymore, i can't bear to see her like that but what can i do and again i'm just helpless... That's when i feel, think that i've make another person feel unhappy by my behaviour... As i'm trying very hard to control myself, i can't take it and just starts to cry...

I know and realized that i had done something really wrong last weekend and i've hurt the person that i love. I also know that she feel so hurt by my action and my behaviour... I guess this the biggest mistake i ever done in my life and i will never do it again... I don't want to hurt people around me and especially if that person is my loved ones... Why is all this happening to me... Why is my happiness end so fast and problem, sadness take place... Just hope any of this days i can talk to her if she got time...